© Robert Sommers 2019

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Twinkies Twinked

The twinkie has long been known as one of the most durable confections known to man, with a shelf life on a par with uranium - 235. It has been said that remnants of twinkies have been found in egyptian sarcophagi and that archaeologists who have sampled them have said they were none the worse for wear.

Today comes news that the effective twinkie shelf life has now effectively nearly doubled. The little yellow logs of creamy goodness can now stand on the shelves for 45 days, as opposed to the pre buyout 26 day duration. What gives? They ain't tellin'.
"The improvement was made under the old company, products were introduced to the market on Nov. 1, 2012 prior to the company's liquidation and prior to the sale of assets to the new owners," said Arnold ( the twinkie spokesman), who declined to comment about what methods were used to extend shelf life.
Mira Calton, nutritionist and co-author of the book, Rich Food, Poor Food, said freezing a product prior to delivery would "most likely require additional preservatives and dough strengtheners being added to the recipes."
Caveat Emptor?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I Rember seeing hotdog buns on a dairy queen that blew up 6 months after the explosion that had sat in sun and they looked perfect no mold yum so just shine the cornucopia of chemicals in America's fav snack. On Craigslist I've seen them go for $50 each. Wow collector tweenkies