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Polar bear with carrot

Friday, April 14, 2017

Dirty rotten scoundrel


I have a long list of personal deficiencies, those that know me well certainly do not need me to point them out for them. One of the things I most known for in my town is having a perpetually dirty car. In fact year in and year out, one vehicle or another, I believe that I have the dirtiest car in Fallbrook.

You see, I live miles out on a dirt road and have spent approximately 62% of my life down one dirt road or another. Two trips a day on said road makes things pretty dusty. If I cared (and I don't) and wanted to keep the thing clean, at the cheapest do it yourself carwash, let's see ...figuring... three bucks a day, would add up to a little more than a thousand bucks for a year. Lot of money, lot of work.

I'm not going to do it. Have no one to particularly impress and better things to do with the money, not to mention time. But in a more and more wealthy and tony Fallbrook, I stick out like a curly haired bohemian at a klan rally, which come to think of it, is about right. I am sure that it has not helped my social standing one bit in this land of mercedes coupes and lexuses and immaculately manicured ranchettes.

The reason that I bring the whole matter up is that I read this article about a Fallbrook Sheriff's Deputy who got an award for tracking down lawbreakers and miscreants. Deputy Evan McCormick is quite good at tracking down stolen cars. And how does he spot them?
“It’s just driving around and running license plates mostly,” said McCormick, who has been with the San Diego County Sheriff’s Department for more than nine years. “You drive around and look for a car that looks like it’s out of place. It’s dirty or cobwebbed and just doesn’t belong. Run plates all night long and you’ll find cars.”
Now I am not suggesting that my dirty car smacks of criminality, I'm certainly no angel, but I had never made the nexus between my dirty van and being a lawbreaker. The whole time I thought I had been projecting soccer mom.

I drove up to Malibu to deliver a painting to day, after a quick stop in Brentwood. Driving down Wilshire I really felt conscious of my sloven appearance. Young hip men and  beautiful women in tight pants that ended five inches above the ankle, no socks, looked at my dirty rig like I was the second coming of Jed Clampett. I tried to stare straight ahead in my shame, my Falltucky sticker now almost unreadable under a thick veneer of dust.

No longer fit for civilization, he's reasonably intelligent and occasionally funny but did you see his dirty car? Do you think he's a criminal?

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After ten years of writing this blog I know a few things. I check the analytics occasionally, know how many people are reading what. And I have to tell you, you people are sick of politics. Music you like, in fact it outpolls politics three or four to one. Pretty pictures you like. But my political opinions? You'd rather get a contagious case of whooping cough.

I don't blame you. It's an onslaught out there. Too real. We are all sick of it. I hear you. Going to dial it down unless there is an absolute imperative. Like this. If you aren't interested in reading it, no point talking to myself.

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I'm not sure what they blew up on Camp Pendleton this morning but have never heard anything that loud in thirty seven years. They had a noise alert so it was planned. My guess is a bunker buster or a MOAB. Sounded like a giant industrial explosion or bombing.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Robert your a great adventurer , don't stop writing anything because of the stupid numbers! Stop looking at the numbers .cheerz

Jon Harwood said...

Yes you are a outsider, however it is in the style of Nietzsche. That is, due to self awareness you are able to stand outside the mores of the craven bourgeois who run this town and rebel against those who spend their lives mimicking the truly rich. You see, a dirty car is not a deficit but a proclamation of individual consciousness in a world that is dedicated to anything but awareness. As a dirty car stands outside the conformist sonmanbulism of the village it might attract the police, not for long though as your conveyance lacks the true filth and lack of care displayed by those who are merely degenerate, not conscious. Luckily, being a conscious individual is a condition that is really difficult to criminalize in this country--at least for now.

Anonymous said...

Dear Robert,
every time the blue heron arrives I know I'm in for a rare & special treat. It's an an encounter of joy on so many levels that I'm humbled even thinking about trying to describe the how & why of it. Smiling Service at it's absolute 'Amazing & Wonderful' best. Wish I'd probably gotten into replying via a 'blog' thing but somewhere way way back in tech comprehension I mis~tied the shoelaces on much of that basic 'how~to' web & cyber stuff, so forgive me, sending these notes now and then via the original less public 'reply' at the top of the Mail page will have to suffice. Anyway, just amazing. Thank you for every 'blasted' word, picture & note of it. Every occasion has been a special happiness event in my life whether the subject matter is on a serious or lighthearted level, all of it a treat, dig ?

I was going to make it a quick & maybe smoother 'Thank you' note but never seem to be able to get that right.
Anyway, Doctor Who Marathon on BBC 'again' here today. It's the prepping all week for the new episodes season opener tonight. Cant shake the good Doctor : ) Very Best to you Robert & looking forward,
from Lenny, Lower East Side in New York City

Anonymous said...

Better thought a miscreant than a soccer mom!

Sanoguy

Stutzy said...

That explosion was the biggest I've heard as well. Word on the street amongst the marines is we are getting ready for war! Calling up the newly released to see if they will re-up. Get ready.