Egret and crab

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

All hail the lightbeings!


The news today is pretty crappy. Wars and rumours of wars. The stock market takes another dive. Jed Clampett sized oil patch wreaks havoc in the gulf. Spanish language now forbidden on the streets. Not knowing what to do, I reached out to an unfamiliar friend, my own higher powered, encrusted deity, creator shaped, god unit. Or any similar almighty being that I might have fantasized about in a weak moment in a previous incarnation.

The truth is, I was raised Unitarian, and don't ever recall much talk of an exalted being, the church sessions pretty much being forums for discussions about peace, civil rights, bad poetry and the occasional wine and cheese function. Not a wide body of liturgy by any standard. But I am happy that I was steeped in a gentle church, with a minimum of fire and no brimstone that I can seem to recall.

I discovered Hesse and Zen post adolescence and dabbled in Mahayana, finally landing on Jung. I started looking at belief systems like a psychoanalytical Margaret Mead, observing the cultural anthropology of the mind. Some humans need to have a certain order in their life, and an angry all powerful father figure keeps them on the straight and narrow.

I read a book once, by Robert Graves and Raphael Eitan, I think it was titled 50 Creation Myths. Fascinating read. The book placed a sumerian myth next to a vedic myth next to a zoroastrian story next to a christian fable and so many were so similar to each other with some fairly minor exceptions. One myth might have the world on the shoulders of a god or a giant and then it becomes a turtle, eagle, etc in the next story. None would necessarily pass any elementary school science quiz. And I figured, this is absurd, there is obviously no right depiction of creation, but there is an obvious human need to bring sense to the big questions of the whole life experience deal. Yet our psyches are so much closer to each other than we think, and regardless of creed, we share much more than one might imagine. Time, counting, social mannerisms, smiles, frowns, the list goes on and on. Just might prove to be a redeeming factor in mankind's continuing existence and survival.

The reason that I launch into this soliloquy is that I have been reading a new age magazine that I was thumbing through in the bathroom and it is so goofy that it got me laughing. It is just so preposterous, like most religion. How semi sane people can swallow any of this swill is beyond me.  I don't care if you are talking to golden salamanders or bargaining with the mosaic god about infanticide, it reads like really bad science fiction to me. But the new agers take it to a new post Urantia level of lunacy. The Life Connection, a monthly periodical that has ads in the back for a host of clairvoyants, mediums, colon therapists, past life counselors, yogis, Akashik librarians, etc.. There are people that can put you on proper speaking terms with a certified angel from the seventh veil, and a woman whose two cats, Reyon and Pudah, are really yoda like ascended masters, and speak through her for friskies and warm milk.

I was reading about Lee and Patricia, who represent Kyron and the Sirian High Council, address unknown but reputedly far from our pissy little three dimensional world. Or Dr. Costa, who has a standing invitation from the  celestial Inner World Council of Masters and the Inner World Doctor Consortium. Others advertise for mercury free dentistry and holistic lawyering. I know one of the regular authors, a psychiatrist who has his head on pretty straight and the astrologer who has been there for eons. Maybe literally.

I have several artist friends who practice Religious Science, I call them my spoonbenders, and they all seem like cool, gentle people and hey, whatever works? But my cynical inner New Yorker wants to say, give me a fucking break to the whole megillah. It is all so Buck Rogers. Ensign Sommers reporting to Xenu High Command as an emissary from Planet Protong.

The truth is that I did have a meeting once with a spiritual being, St. Luke coming down and writing in the sky with two foot high letters of fire and delivering me a blistering message. Which I can't exactly remember. But there were at least 500 micrograms involved and some part of the script may have been lost in translation. I don't even know if I believe me at this point.

In short, in my estimation the new age, vortex, pyramid, crystal, prosperity, reiki, science of mind bunch are no weirder than the Baptists or Jews or Methodists. Probably a great avenue for middle aged folk to get laid. Goofy but harmless. Humans. Hmmm.