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Northern Harrier

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

AirDong™

I was reading this morning that they have finally got those new body scanners online down at the airport. You know, the new ones that can give the screener minute pictures of every mole or ingrown hair on your body. I guess that the new technology has already caused several fist fights after a few snide remarks were made about certain passengers' natural misendowments. People can be so cruel.



So I got to thinking, hey maybe there is a chance to allay some natural feelings of inferiority and make a few bucks in the process and bingo - The AirDong™was born! We can furnish you with a lifelike prosthetic device that will make you the envy of every passenger in the cabin. Made out of real latex in your choice of colors.

God may have made you coach but with this new space age appendage, you will be flying strictly first class.
Stretch your natural shortcomings with AirDong™!

You just slap this baby on in the airport restroom and you will have guaranteed smooth sailing all the way to your intended destination. But don't be surprised if you get a few winks from the flight attendant.*

Everybody will want to see what you are packing!


*caution, may inflate with sudden loss of cabin pressure. 


© 2010 Robert Sommers

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is that device for people who have hang-ups (hahaha) or has Blue Heron reached an all time low?

Blue Heron said...

I tend to go with the latter.

Anonymous said...

I am guessing you mean winks from the MALE flight attendants?

Blue Heron said...

Whatever floats your jet.

Anonymous said...

fucking luv the air dong

truth is, they would sell for real as a gag gift and for the under represented in our population.

Seriously, dude, you should have marketed them. Would be big, like pet rock big!

M.

WildBill said...

Perplexing
penile
problem
prophylactic.

Blue Heron said...

Pshaw.

Anonymous said...

Serious money maker I could see chicks wearing it to freak out security.

M

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Blue Heron said...

Thats funny - great angle!

Anonymous said...

Gives new meaning to a blow job.

Blue Heron said...

I don't understand the previous comment. I am sincerely trying to alleviate major hangups and inadequacy issues and someone has to run the topic down into the gutter. Please try to remember that this is a family blog.

Sanoguy said...

Why not just tape a sausage to your leg??? It's a lot less expensive than the (probably) over inflated (price of the ) Air Dong.

Blue Heron said...

That's fine Sano - until you run into a hungry german shepherd service dog.

grumpy said...

truly a cockamamie post.