Jelly, jelly so fine

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Red team, black team.

The country got hit by two devastating hurricanes and it didn't take long for the evangelical fringe to weigh in. Ann Coulter thinks that Houston electing a lesbian mayor has more to do with the hurricane than climate change. And a whole mess of others are on board. The message is clear. Repent or die.

“These hurricanes are not the result of global warming; they are the Judgment of God because of the innocent blood crying to Him for vengeance."
Antiabortion activist Randall Terry

“I have felt ― and I was afraid to share it with anybody ― that this flood is from God."
Televangelist Jim Bakker

“The whole earth will cry out because of the shedding of innocent blood. That’s what throws nature off more than dumping CO2 or anything.”
Rick Joyner - Morning Star Ministries

"Hurricanes are a spectacular display of God’s immense power. When he puts his power on display, it’s never without reason. There’s a purpose. And we may not always understand what that purpose is, but we know it’s not random and we know that weather is sent to cause us to respond to God in humility, awe and repentance.”
Kirk Cameron

Jesus sends the message home, unless Americans repent, unless Houston repents, unless New Orleans repents, they will all likewise perish.
Minister Kevin Swanson

‘Here’s a city that has boasted of its LGBT devotion, its affinity for the sexual perversion movement in America. They’re underwater.’
Radio Host Rick Wiles

I could go an and on but will spare you. You get the message. God is madder than a hornet's nest about gay people and abortion and is fixing to do some serious smiting. It seems a little opportunistic to me but as I have stated repeatedly, I don't really get religion. I thought the good lord was too busy worrying about the outcome of high school football games to play weather master but it shows what I know.

But it did give me an idea. Or rather EPA ostrich head Scott Pruitt did. We assemble red and black teams and go in to churches and the faith community and calmly talk and argue about the respective merits of superstition and theological mumbo jumbo versus rational thinking, science and CO2 levels. A little pilpul.

Discuss the human need to ascribe supernatural causes to natural and unnatural disasters and lay out a timeline of all the times humans have forecast some calamity as an end times prophecy fulfillment but were found dead wrong. Although I honestly think things are a little too far gone to change anybody's mind.

1 comment:

Ken Seals said...

Pardon me while I throw up!!!