Saturday, March 6, 2010

Virtual Repentance

Catholic Bishops are none too pleased with the new french service which allows people to make their weekly confessions over the phone, skipping over the normal priest. The service cautions that it is intended for more of your garden variety sinning and nothing too grave or mortal.

It was hoped that the dial a confession would serve those busy 21st century on the go types who just didn't have time to make it to church.

"For advice on confessing, press one. To confess, press two. To listen to some confessions, press three," says a male voice welcoming the caller to "Le Fil du Seigneur", or "The Line of the Lord" service, for a price of 0.34 euros (46 cents) a minute.

"In case of serious or mortal sins -- that is, sins that have cut you off from Christ our Lord, it is indispensable to confide in a priest."

I am not a catholic, but I think the confessional is an excellent tool and am surprised that it has not been adopted by other religious creeds.  People have an opportunity to get things off their chests and talk to somebody, it has to be cathartic when you are stressed out. 

I was talking to my catholic buddy Mike at the gym today and he said that he used it like a car wash in college, weekly Sunday absolution for Friday night's sins. Like everything, it can be abused but like I said, it is probably a good thing.

The spokesman for AABAS, the Parisian company that started the service, said that they received about 300 calls the first week. Just giving the almighty a little technology boost in the new millennium. Mon dieu!

Old joke.
An elderly man walks into a confessional. The following conversation ensues:
Man: "I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years, many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I picked up two college girls, hitchhiking. We went to a motel, where I had sex with each of them three times."
Priest: "Are you sorry for your sins?"
Man: "What sins?"
Priest: "What kind of a Catholic are you?"
Man: "I'm Jewish."
Priest: "Why are you telling me all this?"
Man: "I'm 92 years old .... I'm telling everybody."

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