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Late afternoon, Yosemite Valley

Wednesday, January 29, 2020

True food blues

I pulled into Barry's Phoenix home around five-ish Thursday afternoon. I met his son Matthew, who is a great kid and also my fellow temporary lodger, Voracek, who is a big kid too.

Barry asked me what I wanted to do for dinner? I said I was open. Italian is always good. "How about healthy," he said, rather cautiously? "We have a great place." I grunted an assent with all of the false passion I could muster. My first wife and I were vegetarians for two or three years and my family still laughs themselves into stitches at the tofu faux turkey the ex served them one Thanksgiving. Philistine that I am, it's just not my bag. But I am nothing if not a team player and was clearly outvoted.

Now I have to give you a little background on my dinner mates. Barry and Wendy are in young love and he has lost about sixty lbs. in the last five months. They are living on gossamer wings and fairie dust. They probably never even eat, content to stare into the deep pool of each other eyes and coo.

Voracek eats a pound of raw vegetables for breakfast everyday. I think you get the picture; I was hopelessly outgunned by these fanatical health food maniacs.

We get to the restaurant, which happened to be called True Food Kitchen and a tall lass who looked like she had just got off the latest Dead and Co. tour brought us menus. I took one look at the menu and thought wtf?

"Excuse me miss, can you please explain what this place is all about. I'm afraid I'm a little befuddled here. I really don't know if I should order an appetizer or an enema?"

Hippiechick took it in stride, she explained that they followed Dr. Andrew Weil's anti inflammatory diet and food pyramid. They served a delicious mix of nutrients and healthy flavors, with a dollop of environmental awareness thrown in for seasoning. Chemical and dye free, sustainable, non GMO, organic and biodynamic to boot. High on the antioxidants, low on gluten, perfect for maintaining the 21st century hominid. Guaranteed to fix your wayward rutabaga or your money back.

I gave the menu another gander. It was all just a little too weird. And they say Californians are batshit crazy.

Food was pretty good, cauliflower and brussels sprout appetizers for starters. A bit sterile, lacked a certain passion. Forgive me if I have forgotten my entree, it was forgettable. I apologize for being such a barbarian, some of your bodies are temples of god and purity, mine bleeds reuben sandwich and spicy mustard if poked.

But I was a good sport and shouldered through the culinary trial like a trooper. Just don't make me go back.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

True Foods is a CA chain - a nice large one in Mission Valley. Scoff all you want but folks with dietary restrictions (like my wife, my grandson, son in-law, brother, great niece find the menu a heaven from the gluten and lard saturated food that you and I eat.
Dixon

Helen Killeen Bauch McHargue said...

"mine bleeds reuben sandwich and spicy mustard if poked."
As usual, you are so expertly wry. And I'm with you all the way although
I wouldn't bleed reuben sandwich. At the moment, I'd bleed
Harry's bar's Macaroni & Cheese with bacon.

Blue Heron said...

Wry is rye. Where can I find the mac and cheese? That sounds good...

Unknown said...

I love True Food. I've been to the one in Dallas several times and I think they're great! Stick with Tommy burgers.

Blue Heron said...

Thank you Leslie, I will.

Jerry HallJ said...

Organic Roots right here in Temecula is a great store. As good as Jimbo's. Great juice bar, deli and salad bar. They carry all of my specialty items that I used to have drive to Escondido for. Great staff too. Btw Robert they have an excellent organic roast beef sandwich, great burritos, and the best potato salad I've ever had.
✌🏾&💗

Blue Heron said...

You're killing me Jerry. Leslie has actually shopped there for years. I'll meet you at the Hat one day in Murrieta. Deal?

Jerry Hall said...

Deal! Great pastrami and onion rings.

island guy said...

Amazing how the tables have turned in this scenario from the ‘70’s. Then if you were the sprouts eater the majority were all for the roast beef and such and you were the outlier. Personally, I have no problem with your preferences as long as
I get to enjoy you lampooning either (or both) sides

Blue Heron said...

Didn't you know Andrew Weil?

Thomas G Johnson said...

Is there a Jewish deli within, say, the 15 corridor- Fallbrook north to Murrieta, or south to Escondido and west to the coast? A sandwich similar to Cantor's on Fairfax? (or Langer's?) Especially fresh baked Jewish rye. I know about D Z Aiken's and it is a wonderful place, but too far to door dash in a pastrami with potato salad to Fallbrook. Mike's Subs makes a decent sandwich and better if you add extra meat. No rye bread which diminishes it for me - but good...

Blue Heron said...

Miltons in Del Mar is probably the closest. Not great but good. Flower Hill Mall.

island guy said...

Yes, a great guy and one of the best at walking the walk, not just talking the talk. My go to reference for any questions about the interface between Western science based medicine (Harvard medical school degree) and traditional and unconventional approaches. He generally was willing to try on himself most of what he recommends. As far as sprouts epitomizing the health food movement, I long ago read in his writings that certain sprouts are problematic:
“I have long advised against eating legume sprouts raw, as many contain natural toxins that are only broken down by cooking. (The toxin in alfalfa sprouts is canavanine, which can harm the immune system.) “
This pretty much took alfalfa sprouts out of my diet, and I still try to cook mung bean sprouts. After just looking this up, I see:
“Aside from that concern, alfalfa and other types of sprouts may be contaminated with disease-causing bacteria.“
Both quotes from drweil.com website.
Pretty ironic in light of the stereotypes, but he is not too kind to all you red meat eaters either, so do your research and make your choices.
By the way, he seems to still going strong at 77. Here’s a couple of more quotes (from Wikipedia)
Get people back into the kitchen and combat the trend toward processed food and fast food.
Pay attention to your body. The point is everybody is different. You have to figure out what works for you.