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Mammoth Springs

Sunday, February 10, 2019

Grapefruit.

Great dinner at Pamplemousse last night. If you guessed the venison, quail and duck mixed grille I guess that I owe you a dollar.

And besides the great food and delightful company, the restaurant offers something else, the greatest urinal known to man.

You think the Madonna Inn bathroom is cool, this pisser takes it into another dimension.

Pamplemousse is the brainchild of chef and owner Jeffrey Strauss. Jeff, like me, is a big guy with a similarly twisted sense of humor. I think that it is the best restaurant in San Diego, unfortunately I can't afford to eat there except for restaurant week. But last night was special, we were treated by some lovely friends, for a lovely birthday.

First time I stood at the urinal, a video of the owner, strategically placed above the stall, angrily warned me not to piss on his floor. I couldn't stop laughing. Probably pissed all over myself.

I sent our host in to check it out last night and he came back, said he saw nothing.. Hmmm, maybe it was expunged by the p.c. police? I decided to check for myself. I walked past the many patrons having dinner at the bar. Past all the cool paintings. I took my position and unzipped my fly and while taking care of business a video of a large black male appeared right above me on the video screen. He looked down at my humble unit and laughed, "Really, that's it? That is what you got? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha." I wanted to tell the uninvited simulacrum that it was indeed cold out and about the concept of shrinkage but quickly broke off our one sided conversation.

I went back to my seat and quizzed our charming French waiter about the situation. He said that there were indeed twelve different videos and that he himself had to go to a shrink after being humiliated by our video guest over his own inherent shortcomings.

Hope I get a chance to see the rest of the vids some day.

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