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Tufas, Mono Lake © Robert Sommers 2019

Wednesday, July 10, 2019

Buzz

Sunday was the anniversary of Buzz's passing. Two years and three days since I lost my brother. They say time heals all wounds, it's bullshit.

I like this horrible, depressing picture. In a sad sort of way. I took it in the street in front of the hospital, the last time I saw my kid brother conscious and alive. Toronto General. I walked about twenty blocks to get there. Would walk back alone, with Leslie.

The photograph perfectly captures the utter bleakness of the moment, the cold grayness of the day, the loss I felt then and still feel every day.

You think that you will have those people you love forever but it unfortunately doesn't work that way.

Ignominy. I love that word. Having to spend eternity with a pigeon or gull standing on your cap or a sparrow soiling your brow, even if your birthplace was in fact a forge or furnace. Or quarry of stone. Nature offers cruel desserts and nasty last acts.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

this picture is pure poetry.. i love it as well.. you're right... it is bullshit.. time only puts into perspective how special every loved one lost is...

and how precious every moment is..the harmonic that is struck.. the life string that connects us.. each person brings out something unique

in us that no one else can.. or could... i couldn't find words to write you for the losses that you've experienced, because i know they would fail..

this picture says everything, Robert.. of that moment.. that feeling..

and yet..

i can't help noticing in that picture the sign in the midground... suggesting movement.. in western literature, at least.. from left to right,

of a movement forward...


.. i guess this is the only direction we can go..


.. my heart is with you.. thank you for sharing this picture and the stories of your brother, and your family.. whom i never met, with me..


dave in japan

Blue Heron said...

Dave thanks so much for the kind words. I also appreciate your insight on the red sign. I knew it looked incongruent but you made sense of it.